


Jeannette and the Unexpected Niece

by DangerousCommieSubversive



Series: Secret Six: The College Years [3]
Category: DCU, Secret Six
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, Gen, Role-Playing Game, Suddenly Child
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-20
Updated: 2015-06-20
Packaged: 2018-04-05 05:49:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,458
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4168269
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DangerousCommieSubversive/pseuds/DangerousCommieSubversive
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Not to be outdone by Thomas' addition of a juvenile tiger to the household, Jeannette attempts to one-up him by bringing home her twelve-year-old niece instead of playing Dungeons And Dragons, which was the original plan for the evening.</p><p>I mean, she's got reasons for it, but also what's up, there's a middle schooler in the kitchen all of a sudden.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Jeannette and the Unexpected Niece

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so sorry that this took an actual year, oh my god.
> 
> Anyway, dialogue between
> 
> ==
> 
> these
> 
> ==
> 
> markers during any RP scene is out-of-character.

It wasn't even a bar.

It was a _dive._

The Aasimar's Jawbone was a place where the unsavory  of Czernostan met, a place of wicked plans and foul deeds,  a house of secrets —

“A wretched hive of scum and villainy?”

Shut up, Pete.

“Sorry.”

_Anyway._

You were all called here anonymously, each sent a note that was only signed “Mockingbird.” You ha d your own reasons for coming, but the point is—you're all  _here._

_Beep beep._

* * *

 

Jeannette scowled. “Who left their phone on?”

_Beep beep._

“Oh, shit, that's mine.” She tugged her cell phone out of her pocket and glanced at the caller ID, and her eyes went wide. “I have to go check this message. I might need to make a phone call. Be back in a couple of minutes.”

She disappeared into the kitchen, frowning. Scandal rolled her neck. “She definitely sets a good tone. Didn't she say she'd never DM'ed before?”

“She said, and I  _quote,_ that she's used to being a very different kind of dungeon master.” Thomas pushed his chair back a bit so that Katie could jump up into his lap. “I'm definitely excited about this game.”

Bane shrugged. “I'm still dubious.”

A moment later, though, Jeannette emerged from the kitchen again and went straight over to the shoe shelf. “I'm sorry, guys, we'll have to call it off for tonight, there's an emergency.” Before anyone could ask, she said, “Family business. Look, tomorrow's Friday, we can pick it up then. Sorry!”

And she was out the door.

The others looked at each other, worried, and then Floyd shrugged and scooped up his character sheet. “I gotta paper to write anyway.”

* * *

 

Floyd woke up for a moment when Jeannette slipped into bed next to him at half past two. He blinked groggily as she pulled up the covers. “'ssserrything arright, baby?”

“Everything's fine, Floyd.” She kissed him on the cheek. “Go to sleep and I'll explain in the morning.”

* * *

 

_The morning_

 

Floyd woke up with a ferocious case of morning wood.

Looked over to his side—nope, Jeannie was still asleep. She actually looked cute, asleep with her face pressed into her pillow. Not that she wasn't a fucking gorgeous woman, not that Floyd wasn't continually baffled by the fact that she'd decided to go out with him, but she wasn't normally  _cute._ He enjoyed the sight for a moment without waking her up, decided he was feeling too lazy to jack off, and then rolled out of bed and padded down to the kitchen in his boxers to get some cereal.

He had the box of Froot Loops halfway out of the cabinet when the twelve-year-old girl in Halloween pajamas making pancakes at the stove said, “Good morning.”

A moment later she said, “You shouldn't waste cereal like that.”

Floyd just gripped the cereal box more tightly, figuring that if he kept holding it in front of his junk then if the police showed up they'd see that he'd been making an effort. “Who the fuck are you and how did you get in my house?”

She squinted at him. “It's  _not_ your house. It's  _Jeannette's_ house. And she's  _my_ aunt, and  _she_ brought me here, so I'm allowed. Who the fuck are  _you?_ ”

“I'm...Floyd?”

“You don't sound sure. I think I should call the cops.”

“Look, midget, my name's Floyd, Jeannette's my girlfriend, I didn't know she had a  _niece._ ”

“Alice. You want a pancake?”

“ I...yeah, sure.”

“Ok, good, because I think I made too much batter. Maybe you should go put some pants on first so you're not sticking your dick in the Froot Loops.”

“ Who's sticking their dick in the Froot—oh, it's Floyd, I should've guessed.” Scandal elbowed him out of the way and made a little hop up so she could reach the Honey Nut Cheerios. “Hey, Lori. What brings you here? Go put some pants on, Floyd.”

“ Wait, Lori? I thought she said her name was Alice.”

“What? No, she's Lori.”

The girl at the stove started to focus  _very_ intently on her cooking.

Floyd stared at Scandal. “ You  _know_ her?”

“She's Jeannette's niece, of  _course_ I know her. Jeannette and I have been friend s for years.”

Floyd shuffled off, grumbling, the box of Froot Loops still held in front of his crotch.

Lori looked up at Scandal. “You want a pancake, Scandal?”

“Sure thing, Lori.” Scandal ruffled her hair. “Seriously, though, when did you get here?”

“Um. Two in the morning or something? Aunt Jeannie brought me over, but I was kind of sleepy, so I don't really remember when.  At least I get to skip school today, right? ” She was smiling, but she didn't sound especially cheery.

Scandal sat down at the chair closest to her. “Problems at home?”

“Yeah.” Lori stared into the pan with a closed expression on her face. “Yeah, basically.”

“ When did we get a small girl?”

Scandal lost her grip on the box of Cheerios. “ _Christ,_ Pete, how many times am I going to have to say  _don't_ do that before you start  _listening_ to me?”

Pete ignored her; he was peering down at Lori, who was staring up at him, her face red. After a moment he waved a hand in front of her eyes. “Your pancakes are going to burn.”

“Oh,  _shit._ ” She turned back to the stove and starting flipping pancakes in a blur.

By the time  hot food was on the table, Floyd was back with pants on, and Thomas had showed up too, accepting the unexpected presence of a child with the vague aplomb of someone who was only barely awake.  Lori sat down next to Pete and fell nervously silent, watching him out of the corner of her eye with a blush on her cheeks as she ate.

“Oh my goodness, who cooked?” Jeannette floated into the kitchen looking uncharacteristically messy, her hair dropping in her face, her eyes red. “Floyd,  _you_ didn't—Lori! You're not supposed to be up yet, you were supposed to get your sleep!”

“I  _can't,_ I  _always_ wake up early.” Lori scowled down at her pancakes. “I wish I didn't. Being a morning person isn't  _goth._ ”

Scandal looked up from her plate, startled. Thomas stared at Lori as if she was something inexpressibly  cute , like a kitten trying to figure out how to eat a doughnut. Pete clasped his hands under his chin in delight. “ _Are_ you a goth? You're so  _small._ ”

“Waaaait...” Scandal frowned. “Floyd, what were you saying before about how you thought her name was  _Alice?_ ”

Lori scrunched up her face. “It  _is._ I've been meaning to  _tell_ you. I'm  _not_ Lori anymore, I  _hate_ being Lori, I'm  _Black Alice_ now. And I'm going to be a witch when I grow up, and Rachel Roth promised she'd show me how to summon the devil.”

Everyone at the table stared at her for a moment. Floyd said, softly, “Oh my god, she's  _adorable._ ”

“I have seen the devil,” Bane said calmly, as he entered the kitchen behind Jeannette and served himself a plate of pancakes. “I would not recommend his company.”

Lori gaped up at him.  _“Whoa.”_

After a few more seconds Jeannette gathered herself enough to say, “ _Well._ You're not summoning any devils in  _my_ house. At least not until you're sixteen, you still have growing to do. Finish your food and go get dressed, I'm taking you to class with me today  after I've called your school. .”

“ _What?_ But I thought I got to  _skip_ school today!”

“You get to skip  _your_ school, I'm not leaving you in the  _house_ by yourself. Besides, I have gender studies today, you'll enjoy it.”

“ Welcome to Jeannette's house, Alice.” Thomas shrugged. “We all just sort of try not to argue with her.”

* * *

 

“ So what's the deal with Alice?” Thomas was draped across the couch with an anatomy book in one hand, Katie curled up across his feet. “Or Lori, whatever.”

Scandal sighed. “Lori's parents have some issues. Her dad's in the hospital, he's not doing so well. Her mom, Jeannette's sister, she's been coping in some fairly...detrimental ways.”

“Drugs?”

“She's a zombie most of the time, yeah. Forgets Lori's around. Jeannette's been trying to help when she can without getting in the way, but apparently Lori didn't get anything to eat yesterday until Jeannette got over there, so...yeah, we have this kid now.”

Thomas gazed blindly at the ceiling. “Sometimes I think it would've been better if my dad had forgotten that I was around.”

“I know how that goes.”

He paused. “We're getting dangerously into feelings territory here.”

“Yeah, well, this entire house is basically feelings territory, Mr. Kitty, suck it up.” Scandal folded herself up tighter in the armchair.

“Well, I shot my dad, I don't necessarily want to encourage anyone else here to follow my example.”

“Too late, I stabbed mine years ago.” Scandal frowned at her notes. “Of course, he's still alive and well and jet-setting across the globe, as far as I know.”

There was a long silence, and then Scandal reached out, and she and Thomas gently bumped fists, and Thomas said, “We should form a club.”

“You know, that's not a bad idea. Pete'd be in like a shot.”

“So would Floyd. And Bane...might go for it?”

“I think Jeannette would be in just for fun.”

“Hell, why not.” Thomas grinned. “We could call ourselves something stupid. The Sinister Six, maybe.”

“The _Secret_ Six. We can't go around advertising this shit.”

“That's fair.”

The door banged open, and Pete flung himself across the back of the couch with a vivid disregard for both his own safety and Thomas'. “ _Scandal._ I have been _ejected_ from my _writing workshop._ ”

The other two stared at him, and Scandal said, slowly, “How do you get kicked out of a writing workshop?”

“I read them a poem.”

“Oh my god, what kind of a poem gets you kicked _out_ of a writing workshop?”

Pete sprang to his feet and assumed a dramatic pose. “I'll read it to you. It's titled, very cleverly I think, 'I Wonder What It's Like To Fuck A Butterfly,' and it begins thusly—”

Jeannette, coming through the front door with niece in tow, promptly clapped her hands over Lori's ears, causing Lori to squawk indignantly. “Aunt _Jeannie!_ I'm not a _baby!_ ”

From the kitchen, Bane rumbled, “It would most likely tickle.”

And at this point Katie also wanted to get in on the excitement, so she leaped off Thomas' feet—causing him to yelp with pain—and began to make playful growling noises and bat at Pete's ankles.

Pete huffed and stormed off with a muttered, “None of you appreciate art,” with Katie trailing after him.

“We _do_ appreciate your art, Pete, it just needs to be the right time and place.” Jeannette shrugged off her coat. “Now Scandal, my darling, I have good news.”

Scandal blinked. “About...what?”

“Lori enjoyed sitting in on my class today, and she's told me she'd like to learn more about feminism and the patriarchy.”

Lori nodded enthusiastically.

“Unfortunately it's my turn to cook dinner, so I don't have time to talk to her about it right now, but I told her that you'd be the right person to come to.”

Scandal stared at Lori, and then beamed, dropped her notes on the coffee table, and cracked her knuckles. “Siddown, Lori. We're gonna start with bell hooks.”

* * *

 

At dinner, Floyd said around a mouthful of soda bread, “So we still playing Dungeons and Dragons tonight?”

There were some general noises of agreement, and then Lori, who'd spent most of the meal not talking and eating her food at alarming speed, said, “Holy shit, are you guys playing D and D? How long's the campaign been running? Who's DM'ing? Can I play?”

Jeannette blinked. “I'm DM'ing, Lori. We only just started. We were starting our first session last night when you texted me.”

Lori turned slightly red. “I'm sorry I interrupted.”

“Don't be, sweetheart, you're more important than a game. Anyway, if you'd like to play with us that'd be wonderful. Guys?”

Floyd peered at Lori dubiously. He, more than any of them, hadn't quite gotten the hang of Lori's presence yet, and kept nervously checking his fly, as if he feared that he might find himself pantsless in front of a child again. “Do you know how to play?”

Her immediate response was to pull out her phone and point to an app icon on the main screen. “Full player and DM handbooks, all the monster manuals, plus like fifty splats. My friend Gar's friend Vic made it but it got taken off the App Store after, like, two days, but I got it anyway. You got a spare character sheet?”

Pete saw Floyd's dumbfounded look and grinned. “I _like_ her.”

Lori blushed.

* * *

 

It wasn't even a bar.

It was a _dive._

 

= =

 

“ Jeannie, we heard this bit.”

“Shut up, Floyd, it's ambiance. And anyway Lori didn't hear it.”

“ _Alice. God,_ Aunt Jeannie.”

“You can hush too.”

 

= =

 

The Aasimar's Jawbone was a place where the unsavory of Czernostan met, a place of wicked plans and foul deeds, a house of secrets and mysteries.

In the back of the tavern was a smoky private room, and in that room was a round table. Ranged around the table were a motley crew of travel-stained adventurers. There was a vast man in priestly garb, a colorfully-dressed Tiefling with a lute, a half-elf with a bow and a strange contraption covering one eye, a slim woman in dark clothes with at least five visible daggers. One of the cat-folk of the plains, grooming his claws with menacing care. And, strangest of all, another Tiefling, but a _child,_ a girl swathed in black robes with a book tucked under her belt.

The travelers eyed each other warily. Each had been summoned on short notice, sought out by messengers bearing gold and promises.

The half-elf adjusted his strange eyepiece and drawled, slowly, “Any'a y'all about to own up to callin' us here? Me, I reckon it's the big feller here.”

 

==

 

“Floyd, why does your ranger sounds like a cowboy?”

“He's from the western forest.”

“He's—Jeannette, is his ranger allowed to sound like a cowboy?”

“Yes, Scandal. He's allowed to sound like a cowboy.”

 

==

 

Before anyone could respond to the half-elf's allegations, however, the room's door opened again and another person entered. This one was heavily robed and hooded, and beneath the hood their face was concealed by a grotesque mask of a cackling face.

The robed person sat down at the last empty seat at the table and said, very calmly, “Thank you all for coming so quickly. You may call me Mockingbird.”

 


End file.
